Chapter 746: The Definition of Fear

"How would I know?" Qi Xia retorted.

"Isn't it your own 'Hui Xiang' and the things you've done yourself? Yet you're pretending not to know?" Chu Tianqiu asked.

After hearing this, Qi Xia shook his head helplessly. "Chu Tianqiu, don't say I don't know. Even my own thoughts are something that 'Tian She' can't decipher."

"Oh...?"

"He's much more clear-headed than I am," Qi Xia said.

Chu Tianqiu furrowed his brow slightly upon hearing this. "So, when I wrote those two notes, my thoughts were also muddled by yours?"

"You'll have to ask yourself," Qi Xia replied. "I'm not you, so I have no idea what you're thinking. Maybe I haven't hidden anything, and it's just that you've gone mad."

"I've... gone mad?" Chu Tianqiu nodded. "You're right. I didn't go mad after killing Wen Qiao Yun—I was already mad before I killed her."

After saying that, he looked at Qi Xia and asked, "So, when did you go mad?"

"I haven't," Qi Xia answered. "My mind has never been clearer than it is now."

"I see." Chu Tianqiu chuckled dryly. "True madmen never think they're mad. It seems I'm still a step behind you."

"You can't say that," Qi Xia shook his head. "You have a natural advantage. As long as you're in 'Hui Xiang', you can become a rational madman. But I can't. The only way I could reach this state was by completely demolishing my psychological defenses and rebuilding them with the most terrifying things."

"Completely demolishing your psychological defenses...?" Chu Tianqiu paused slightly. "And rebuilding them with the most terrifying things...?"

"That's right."

"Is that something a normal person could do?"

"Are we... still normal people?" Qi Xia asked.

"We..." Chu Tianqiu gave a bitter laugh. "You're right... we're probably not even 'people' anymore."

"Yes, no 'person' can escape from here," Qi Xia said.

"So, how exactly did you demolish your psychological defenses?" Chu Tianqiu asked.

"Have you... ever felt fear?" Qi Xia asked in return.

"'Fear'?" Chu Tianqiu found the word intriguing. He pointed with his slender, blood-stained finger at the dark red sky above. "Qi Xia, do you know why the sky is dark red?"

Qi Xia looked up. "Because it's filled with the pulverized, rotting flesh and blood of people from the past decades."

Chu Tianqiu then pointed to the corpses scattered across the playground. "And do you know why those people are lying there?"

"Because someone needs them to die, so they die."

"Exactly," Chu Tianqiu said. "This place has no 'common sense' and no 'law'. Anyone can kill for their own pleasure. We live here to die, but we die to live. The person who wants to protect you might be doing it to kill you, and the one who wants to kill you might want you to live..."

"That's how it is."

"Walking on this sticky, viscous ground, you ask me if I've felt 'fear'?" Chu Tianqiu grinned. "Qi Xia, every day I've spent here, my back has been ice-cold, and my scalp has been numb. I'm truly afraid."

"Oh?"

"But does that help?" Chu Tianqiu shook his head. "So many people have placed their hopes on me. I have to pretend everything's fine, act stronger than anyone else, and tell everyone there's hope ahead. Wandering in this hellish city, and you ask if I've felt 'fear'?"

"But that's far from enough," Qi Xia said. "Just having your back ice-cold for decades and your scalp numb for decades—how could that count as 'fear'?"

Chu Tianqiu let out a light snort and turned to look into Qi Xia's eyes. "Then tell me... what is 'fear'?"

"The fear I'm talking about involves people you love," Qi Xia said expressionlessly.

"Ha." Chu Tianqiu chuckled dryly. "People you love? Were they kidnapped? Or killed? Is that terrifying for you? Qi Xia, I killed Wen Qiao Yun with my own hands."

Qi Xia took a deep breath and said, "What if Wen Qiao Yun was uncontrollably replicated into countless versions? One of them has its eye enlarged and hung in the sky as the sun, while the others are dismantled into flesh and bones to rebuild an entire city. Her meat forms the ground, her bones the walls, her blood the rivers—rivers so foul that even fish can't breathe in them. Every day, you walk on it, trampling her shattered flesh with every step, causing her endless pain. You breathe in the rusty smell constantly. The city pulses like a massive living thing, but you don't know how to save her, and she doesn't know how to save you. The only version of Wen Qiao Yun who can still move pretends nothing has happened to keep you from going mad. Every day, she cooks meals for you using maggots and pieces of her own flesh and blood... How about that?"

After hearing Qi Xia's words, Chu Tianqiu fell into a long silence.

If what he had described was "fear," then the scenario Qi Xia painted couldn't even be called that anymore.

There wasn't a word in the dictionary accurate enough to describe that feeling.

If he were standing in a city made from Wen Qiao Yun's flesh and blood, what would he feel?

Horrified? Shocked?

No, that didn't begin to cover it.

"Qi Xia, do you still claim you're not mad?" Chu Tianqiu asked.

"I might have already passed the stage of 'madness'," Qi Xia replied expressionlessly. "I feel like I've reached a realm I've never entered before. To handle thoughts in this realm, 'mad' isn't enough."

"So, is this what you meant by demolishing all your psychological defenses and rebuilding with the 'most terrifying things'—and those things are made from Yu Nian An's flesh and blood?"

Qi Xia nodded. "Yes."

"But even a 'Hui Xiang' user couldn't do that," Chu Tianqiu said slowly, furrowing his brow. "How on earth did you manage it?"

"It's a long story. I couldn't have done something like this 'miracle' on my own. I needed a 'god' capable of destroying an entire city, and a 'Ru Meng' capable of rebuilding it."

"The two people you're talking about..." Chu Tianqiu paused. "Wait, that's clearly just one person, right? 'He' could do it all... You've not only manipulated 'Qing Long', but you've also schemed against 'Tian Long'?"

Qi Xia slowly closed his eyes. "Chu Tianqiu, our 'battlefield' has several locations. I can't control the others—only one is under my command."

"The battlefield you control...?"

"That's none of your concern. It's my own matter," Qi Xia said.